7:52pm (Predictions)
United States Senate:
- Al Franken wins DFL primary but is forced to admit that Priscilla Lord Faris really did scare the hell out of him with her powerful insurgency through the Brodkorb blog.
- Norm Coleman wins Republican primary.
- Dean Barkley wins Independence primary.
- Aubrey Immelman wins an upset over Michele Bachmann after voters completely forget that she was even our representative.
- Elwyn Tinklenberg wins but concedes that his non-existent challenger was a tough campaigner.
- Mark Olson wins after traveling the district throwing bibles at any Krueger supporter trying to vote.
8:09 pm: Oh my GOD, Norm Coleman is totally going to lose!
8:12 pm: Congratulations, Aubrey Immelman! He got 50 votes...
8:14 pm: Norm Coleman is under 90%. Brodkorb is sweating bullets right now. Also, Priscilla Lord Faris is in the 35% range.
8:20 pm: Anytime now we will be hearing the concession speech from Elwyn Tinklenberg as he is currently garnering only 100% of the vote. I am watching a Priscilla Lord Faris ad right now. Don't you think its a little late for that one?
8:26 pm: State of the Senate Race. So, Mr. Williams, how is that Independence Party endorsement working out for you?
8:34 pm: While Aubrey Immelman is only garnering 13% of the vote, we still have yet to see returns from the crucial sympathetic to vagrant hitchhiker precincts!
8:39 pm: My biggest concern right now is that Bill Dahn only has 59 votes in a statewide race. Doesn't he have any family in the state? I could garner that much with just my mother's side of the family. Poor guy...
8:42 pm: The first numbers from SD 16. Concede Mark, CONCEDE!
9:07 pm: OMG, Bachmann just posted a vote total of all 6's. hmmmm.
9:20 pm: Dean Barkley with only 62% of the vote! Obviously, a vote of no confidence. Norm Coleman with less than 100% of the vote! Again, no confidence. Al Franken with 69% of the vote! Obviously, a sexual innuendo. That SICKO.
9:28 pm: Krueger leading Olson 55% to 44%! This ballot has got to be rigged because NO ONE beats God's Representative.
9:45 pm: How much longer can this go on and still have me interested? not much longer...
9:53 pm: State of the race in SD16 (Can Olson recover from this deficit?)
10:15 pm: I am going to bed assuming the following things- Norm Coleman won but given his inability to unify the Republican Party around him he is doomed.
- Dean Barkley won even though he was running against 6,000 other candidates.
- Al Franken won but, well, who cares...
- The people of the 6th District are clearly voting FOR Michele Bachmann to keep her from coming back to the district.
- Alison Krueger defeated God's obvious endorsed candidate. The endtimes are near...
- The people that voted for perennial candidate, Bruno Gad, need to stop voting because they clearly don't have the mental capacity to participate in our system of government.
2 responses to "Primary Liveblog: Riddled With Sarcasm And Fallacy..."
When I checked the SOS website, Bachmann had the total of 6666. I am glad you got a screen shot of it.
I voted and waited for the morning results. I had two surprises - Mary Ann Kiefer as second general election ciandiate along with Jeff Wise, City of Ramsey city council - although I know everyone was watching that race and I probably needn't comment.
The other the non-spousal abuser winning, 16. And a third, same area, Kiffmeyer 16B beating nobody in opposition. I expected nobody to do better, to pull an upset, hopefully.